#IVE GOTTA LUMP IN MY THROAT CUZ

[unsurebazookacore]

my dumbass watching pjo waiting for riptide by vance joy to start playing

[ijustwantagoodurl]

.

[grubhivemind]

SAGE: -its later in the night and no one is on the beach right now, but she is, sticking her bare feet in the sand and watching the tide rise and fall in the moon light.  it's peaceful. it's white noise. and maybe it's a little lonely, but it feels better than trying to fall asleep in a room alone.-

JACE: -it seems easiest to slip away from social situations when people aren't really paying attention... he was able to go off on a walk by himself while the others seemed distracted. now he's back, but he doesn't feel like he's cleared his thoughts much at all.- 

JACE: -he notices sage alone and feels much more comfortable approaching someone one-on-one, and especially his cousin. she has an energetic presence but in a way that's similar to his own, so he relates to it more than he stresses about it. he shuffles over, taking a seat beside on her on the sand.- 

JACE: Hi.

SAGE: -she hears jace approaching and smiles at him as he takes a seat- hey!!!! can't sleep either????

JACE: Well... I havent really tried... But I doubt Ill be able to. -pulls his legs up to his chest and hugs them.-

SAGE: -nods, understanding- sometimes it's scary to try when there's some awful things going on...... 

SAGE: -looks at him- have you been able to talk about it???

JACE: -pauses and rests his head on his knees.- Not... really.

JACE: Its um... I dont know. -already feels himself getting upset.- 

JACE: Im not sure what Im supposed to say.

SAGE: -puts a very gentle hand on his shoulder- you're not supposed to say anything..... but if you want.....i wouldn't mind listening

JACE: -squeezes his eyes shut, focusing on the contact.-Um... 

JACE: Its just-- 

JACE: Complicated... 

JACE: I dont feel like I can talk about it.

SAGE: that's okay 

SAGE: i get that 

SAGE: -pauses- sometimes it's nice just to have some kind of white noise you know 

 SAGE: like this

JACE: -swallows the lump in his throat, trying to listen to the sound of the ocean past his heart thumping in his chest.- 

JACE: Did... Did Joel say anything about me?

SAGE: -looks over at jace- what do you mean????

JACE: ... I mean... 

JACE: I know he wants to say he told me so. 

JACE: About... going into the woods. And about K... -sniffles. ugh.- 

JACE: Kougah.

SAGE: -her expression softens- i think maybe....he wants to be in control of the situation????? so you don't get hurt...... 

SAGE: and maybe he's a little scared too......because he cares about you 

SAGE: and from his perspective things are going in a frightening direction 

SAGE: when for you your relationship feels really good 

SAGE: before all this stuff happened i mean

JACE: Hhh... -hides his face. it must be really obvious why he was running around with kougah like he was. he feels so predictable and transparent.- 

JACE: I know, but... I dont know... 

JACE: I didnt want to disappoint anybody.

SAGE: that's pretty impossible jace..... 

SAGE: i hate disappointing people too but.....sometimes you can't avoid it

JACE: -tears start leaking past his palms, despite his attempts to hide his face.-I dont know what to do now... I feel so lost. 

JACE: Everything hurts so much.

SAGE: -moves to hug her cousin tightly- i think.......you're supposed to feel lost 

SAGE: and it's okay if you do...... 

SAGE: do you um..... 

SAGE: would you rather be here or there for the trial????

JACE: -leans into her, resting his head against her shoulder- Im... not sure. 

JACE: I get this feeling like... He wouldnt want me there anyway.

SAGE: where is he being kept do you know?????

JACE: -sniffles and nods.- Yeah... They have a little police station on Avalon. I watched them... take him in. 

JACE: And I had to fill out a report...

SAGE: -pauses for a moment- ....... 

SAGE: how secure is that police station exactly?????

JACE: .... -turns his head to look up at  her- Ummm....... 

JACE: Well, its not exactly... the most fortified place Ive ever been in.... 

JACE: ... Our vacation home is probably more secure. 

JACE: Why??????

SAGE: -looks around a little- well............ 

SAGE: i'm just wonderingn if.....there's a way he can get out early

JACE: ............... 

JACE: You mean like??? Break him out????????

SAGE: well you don't have to say it like THAT...... 

SAGE: but maybe!!!!

JACE: -HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO FEEL ABOUT THIS, aside from some weird excitement... he doesn't like that he feels that way about it though. whoops.- 

JACE: We cant do that..............

SAGE: we can't?????

JACE: .... Well, we absolutely could... 

JACE: I just mean we shouldnt because thats!!! Not legal. And... probably immoral.

SAGE: i mean.......i can't name any avalon laws off the back of my hand that say that's illegal....

JACE: ..... I didnt realize you were so well versed in avalonian law. >_> 

JACE: -HEAVY SIGH...- Sage....... I appreciate it but right now Im... 

JACE: Its hard. I dont even know if I can... forgive what happened... 

JACE: Do you.... Do you think its forgivable?

SAGE: -smiles a little- there's always somebody who's going to be able to forgive something no matter what it is.....everybody may not agree but i guess you just gotta think about what's forgiveable for you!!!!

JACE: :( 

JACE: .... You really think so? And that... thats okay? 

JACE: I...... 

JACE: I know hes not a bad person..... He doesnt just hurt people..... 

JACE: But I dont know if I believe in... an eye for an eye!!! Its-- 

JACE: Its so complicated.....

SAGE: i know that you see good in him..... 

SAGE: and i know you're pretty awesome at finding your way in and out of things!!!!!! 

SAGE: so there's really no way to say if it's right or not but i'll be damned if we can't do anything about it!!!!

JACE: -despite all the conflicting feelings, he manages to smile at that.- 

JACE: I think Im going to need time to figure things out with Kougah... Um. If I even have an option. 

JACE: But I know there are other things I need to do. On Avalon.

SAGE: -nods- yeah??? like what?????

JACE: Theres no one to look after the spirits in the forest with Kougah gone... They need someone who. Uh. Kinda knows what theyre doing.

SAGE: i'll go with you if you want.....i wouldn't mind learning!!!

JACE: -peers at her, grateful...- Maybe. I mean... its dangerous.

SAGE: -puts her dukes up- i'm dangerous!!!!!!!

JACE: Hehe. I know you are. 

JACE: Well... if my plan takes off, then Ill give you a call. 

JACE: -starts gathering himself and stands.- I... think Im gonna try to sleep now.

SAGE: -she smiles at him and looks up as he stands- okay!!!! 

SAGE: if you need anything just give me a call okay?????

JACE: -smiles softly and nods.- I will, Sage. 

JACE: And... thank you for listening to me. I really appreciate it. 

JACE: And the support.

SAGE: of course lil cuz!!!!!! 

SAGE: -holds out her fist for a bunp-

JACE: Heheh. -goes in for the bunp. contact MADE.- 

JACE: Ill see you later... And good luck getting some sleep. -waves, but only as he's walking away does he realize maybe he should have asked how she was doing too... UGH. STUPID JACE. he scurries off, embarrassed about his CLEAR blunder.-